In front of me i have a paper. It says; SHOUT OUT, Sáráhkká, Miss Björk.
With some names, mentors and gurus. With some ideas about the road I am trying to walk and some wishes.
Since april I am home in my city. Skellefteå. The summer is amazing in hte north, it is just so pure and fresh and full of life. And this summer must be one of the warmest. We have been blessed with sun and very rarely some thunder. When the rain actually comes, I breath out and can stay home indoors without feelinf stress to be in the sun. For most swedish people it is blasphemy to not be outside in the sun if the sun is there. I guess it has to do with the abolute absent of sun during the winter.
Anyway. The summer is here and I have some land and have been growing, taking care of the land.
Potatoes, sallad, onion, garlic, physalis and carrots amongs other are all popping up now. How fun is it so have a look at all those things that the ground covers and nuture until they come up and we can eat them.
My idea was to try to be self-sustainable. But lets say I have a little bit more to learn and to have such a small land as I do, is not enough for food for me during winter time.
So I have been all witchy and picking herbs that can be used for the and infusions later on in the winter time. It is fun to pick herbs but for sure i need a bigger place to dry them all and a freezer too.
Since april I am home in my city. Skellefteå. The summer is amazing in hte north, it is just so pure and fresh and full of life. And this summer must be one of the warmest. We have been blessed with sun and very rarely some thunder. When the rain actually comes, I breath out and can stay home indoors without feelinf stress to be in the sun. For most swedish people it is blasphemy to not be outside in the sun if the sun is there. I guess it has to do with the abolute absent of sun during the winter.
Anyway. The summer is here and I have some land and have been growing, taking care of the land.
Potatoes, sallad, onion, garlic, physalis and carrots amongs other are all popping up now. How fun is it so have a look at all those things that the ground covers and nuture until they come up and we can eat them.
My idea was to try to be self-sustainable. But lets say I have a little bit more to learn and to have such a small land as I do, is not enough for food for me during winter time.
So I have been all witchy and picking herbs that can be used for the and infusions later on in the winter time. It is fun to pick herbs but for sure i need a bigger place to dry them all and a freezer too.
I live with my dad again, as i usually do back home. But since I have been on the road since 2007 I really need to unpack and feel i have a home for some time. I don´t know if it is possible but I will try.
That is the reason for my paper in front of me. To try to see a longer plan, the ground I want to build to not feel so insecure whenever I travel. And to feel that I am starting a bigger project, a home project!
To be able to do that I guess i have to have an income of some sort. Sáráhkká is going great but not enough to live from it. I really wish I had planned better last couple of months and planned for BOOM so I could go there and sell some of my thingis.
BUT 2016 have been a struggle in so many way, with love, with self love, with finance, with goals and inner strenght.
I wish I could point my finger in any direction and say that this or that was the trigger. But I can not. It was a process and still is one huge process and learning time for me.
I am learning to speak my truth before i hurt myself or others. I have learned to hold back my head and things my ego want to say and do.
I have learned to hold myself in my arms and say: "You are doing your best!"
I have hurt people around me, but this time without feeling guilt! I realized that I don´t have to feel guilt anymore.
Things just happen and sometimes it is good and feels good. And sometimes it feel strange/bad/sad. That is just life.
Life teach me to step back and reflect. Not take things so personal and not try to find the reason for the things that is happening. No rather to just have a look at the mess and see what feelings it awakens.
I am learning also to lissen inside.
Tomorrow is my sisters BIRTHDAY: 24 Years old! Love her so much.
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